Writer, Author, Student

Posted on September 14, 2009 by lalber

I passed a quiet weekend with my writing. This morning, it occured to me that I experienced my writer’s life from three distinct vantage points.

As Lisa the Writer, I, as you might expect, wrote. In fact, on Saturday I officially finished Act I of the new novel. I call it a step in the right direction that I wrote toward the first dramatic point, instead of winging my way toward it.

As Lisa the Author, I received a sweet surprise from my book group. After discussing Sue Milller’s The Senator’s Wife, my friends thrilled me to pieces by pulling out the Elizabeth George anthology that contains one of my short stories. They’d bought copies and insisted I autograph them–oh my! I was tickled to pieces, and, of course, froze up at the thought of signing the books. What was I supposed to write?

I wrote personal bits to them, but this fun experience got me thinking about practicing my signature and about coming up the quick autograph statement. “Enjoy!” is a common one. “Best thoughts!” “With every good wish!”

It’s fun to dream.

As Lisa the Student, I began a 10-week writing workshop. A writing buddy happened to mention the class, and within five minutes I railroaded him into emailng the instructor for the both of us (since we were at a coffeehouse and he had his Mac). We nabbed the last two spots. The author, April Henry, is a NYT bestseller who writes thrillers; and the class focuses on suspense, mystery, thriller, crime; and since I need to amp up my plotting and pacing skills; and since I’m starting something new…Serendipity!

Today’s Friday?

Posted on September 11, 2009 by lalber

: Current mood: industrious

I call it a dandy sign that I turned down dinner with friends tonight. It’s not that I’m pathetic or antisocial, it’s that I floated around in fiction mode all week, lost track of the days, and figured tomorrow for another weekday.

Has that ever happened to you?

I also forgot that my book group is meeting on Sunday to discuss The Senator’s Wife by Sue Milller. I haven’t started the book yet…

All this forgetfulness is fine by me; it means I’m finally immersed in a long fiction project. I’m a little fearful that the next round of work deadlines (started to heat up this week) will derail me from the writing. I need to figure that one out, for sure.

But, meanwhile, working from home, you’d think the weekend distinction wouldn’t matter, but the notion is instilled into my hardwiring. Usually anyhow. Since I already declined a dinner out, I’m pretending tonight’s a typical Thursday night, or maybe Wednesday. I’ll start the next scene tonight before bed and continue it tomorrow morning.

Silly sidenote: What am I doing as I write this post, specifically this sentence at exactly 9:42 p.m.? I’m watching the new Melrose Place pilot episode! Yee gads, I know, I know! So far, this episode features murder, bribery, cougar action, adultery, financial ruin, a shaky marriage proposal, sexual proposals (for $$s), and depraved ambition. Maybe I am a little pathetic and antisocial, after all?

(P.S. Was the old Melrose Place that I watched with addictive glee as silly as this one?)

My Messy Office

Posted on September 6, 2009 by lalber

Just finished writing a short scene, and was about to start the next, when I made the mistake of gazing around my inner sanctum. Bad mistake — now I’m distracted by the mess. Over the past few weeks I’ve accomplished new heights of domestic godliness in all rooms except this one. I scrubbed, dusted, organized, vacuumed, and even carpet-cleaned. (Yes, I rented an actual machine.)

Except for the rugs, my industrious spurt did not extend to the office. The cleaning task is a burning imperative at this point. Unfortunately, I’m intimidated by my paper piles. Too many of them, and — I cheated! —

Sacrilege! A migrated paper pile atop my beloved dictionary!

some of them migrated here from other rooms during the Big Clean.

Nothing to do but take my laptop to a coffeehouse, I think. This IS a holiday weekend, after all.

How many old manuscripts do I need, anyhow?

And while I'm at it, I'd better dust too...

Started the New Novel!

Posted on September 2, 2009 by lalber

And it wasn’t as traumatic as all that. In fact, it felt natural, and as soon as I began writing, my anxiety drained away. Finished the first scene, and I’m okay with it for now. Gets me started.

However, I can’t help but wonder if I’ll ever be able to write “fast.” As in fast-paced…One of the things I’m doing differently this time is concentrating on suspense. As in, I’m going to write a suspense novel. I’m going to focus on pacing and plot. I’m going to have fun with it.

So, what do I do? Write a first scene that’s kinda quiet. I couldn’t write one of those wham-bam novels if I tried. And I am trying…I re-read the scene several times, feeling the usual self-doubt, but still overall, pleased at having started.

One thing I know about myself: I think symbolically, so without realizing it or particularly trying, I’ll have described something in the setting — for example, Christmas lights — and I’ll have described these lights in a way that illustrates my character’s mood, and then maybe a string flickers out, furthering the mood, inciting the character to reflect (but not for too long) on something…

Does that sound fast-paced to you?

Definitely not wham-bam, but, on the other hand, did I accomplish my first-scene goals? Grab quickly? Introduce an intriguing main character in conflict? End on an open-ended note? Introduce elements that will echo later?

I think so — I hope so. I guess we’ll see!

Lesson of the day: Accept my writing style while improving on my weaknesses.

I Get Scared

Posted on August 31, 2009 by lalber

I’ve been working on a new novel idea, and I’m doing it differently this time. (Hopefully I’ll elaborate on that soon.) At the moment, I’m a little scared. Do you get scared right before you begin your first scene?

I’m so anxious, my chest wall presses up against my sternum. It’s a little tight in there, like maybe my ribs have morphed into squeezing tentacles. A friend reminded me to have fun with this new story. But I’m still taking it all too seriously, probably because I want this fiction-thing to work out. I’ve been disappointed over the last year. Losing agent, languishing finished manuscripts, writing grant fini and day-job sucking at my creative marrow…

I can’t avoid the writing forever — and by avoidance I mean engaging in endless story-development exercises — because at some point the head of steam compels me to set words on paper. I feel uncomfortable and itchy, just gotta start. I’m at the teetering point now. I’ve been here before. The discomfort is familiar, and I’m thankful for that. I’ve worked through it before and will work through it now.

This discomfort in a good sign. The story has almost completed its initial gestation period.

This discomfort differs from that I felt at the beginning of the summer, when I thought I’d never have another story idea. Now that’s the truly scary place! Glad I’m past that.

Rethinking This Blog

Posted on August 28, 2009 by lalber

Current status: After a week’s vacation visiting nephews, relaxed for the moment.

I may not be here on the page, but I ponder my blog often. I think to myself: Ah, I should write about that. Or: That would be a good blog post. But then, I don’t get around to writing the new posts. Instead, I jot a list of the posts I will write. Something like this:

Library
Cultivating creativity
Taking stock

Hmm…Now I don’t remember what I was going to write. I’ve led myself into a blog-tangle, as if my posts need to be deep or significant — and include an appropriate photo, too. I’ve complicated the process.

Silly.

So, I’m going to try a new blogging method: Shorter posts (hear these are better anyhow, for readability), not necessarily with an image. Reminder to self: This blog is about the trials and tribulations of my writing life. Most of the time, these trials and these tribulations aren’t deep or significant. They’re the daily blips that I imagine are typical of most fictionistas.

But hey, look what I just did–wrote a mini-essay about shortening my posts…And, included photos, too!

My (Little) Taste of the Big-Time

Posted on August 3, 2009 by lalber

On Friday night, C, K, and I went to a movie. It being C’s birthday, and because this was a girly-friend custom, C picked the movie (a creepy one, also a custom), which we ambled toward after happy-hour drinks and a little shopping.

It just so happened that we passed a Barnes & Noble on our way to the theatre. C and K were too cute, wanting to check out the anthology I’ve mentioned many times already (can’t get enough of it!) in its natural habitat.

I need to practice my signature -- this is the wobbly version

Admittedly, I hadn’t thought to do this yet, so their enthusiasm grabbed me up too. We perused the “New Mystery” section, but, alas, we saw no sign of the anthology. We asked the information-desk lady, and she comfirmed that they had one copy left.

But where was this lone copy of TWO OF THE DEADLIEST? Answer: Up front on the “New Fiction” table! Too cool! I probably wouldn’t have said anything because of my horrifyingly dismal shameless-self-promotion skills, but K mentioned that I was a contributor.

And here’s where the little taste of the big-time comes in: Information-desk lady let me sign that lone book, and afterwards she slapped an “Autographed Copy” sticker on it!

I felt like a teeny, tiny star on the fiction horizon as C and K pulled out their cell phones to snap pictures of me and the book. We giggled like fiends, and the security guard watched us with a knowing smile. He’d lent me the pen I used to sign my story. I’m sure he’s seen local authors before, but this was a first for me!

Later, in the theatre’s bathroom, I called over the stalls to C and K: “If that isn’t enough to inspire me to get on with the next project, I don’t know what is.”

Maybe, just maybe, stuff’s starting to percolate again. Maybe, just maybe.

Hey, There’s My Name on the Back Cover!

Posted on July 20, 2009 by lalber

I’ve had a few short stories published, and I’ve received author’s copies in the mail. But today I received a whopper of an author’s copy. A luscious, 460-page hardcover anthology that’s so fresh, it squeaks. And, ah, that new-book smell, my nose up against the spine from the inside, no doubt killing brain cells sniffing the spine glue…

Finally! Two of the Deadliest, edited by Elizabeth George, has arrived. I mentioned this book in this post. And now I’ll quote Elizabeth George, from her Introduction:

“Included in this volume is something a bit different. In the second portion of the book, you will find “Introducing…,” a section devoted to a group of writers who are either largely unknown or who have not been published before. These women come from various backgrounds — they are journalists, educators, and techies — and they have all been students of mine at one time or another, in one venue or another. I have asked them to participate in order to bring them to the readers’ attention and, perhaps, to the attention of editors and publishers. It’s a rough publishing world these days, and people of note are often disregarded.”

Kudos to Ms. George for inviting us newbies to participate. She could have offered the page-space to well-known novelists instead — thus attracting their readers. Thank you, EG!

Life’s Progress — Or Not

Posted on July 18, 2009 by lalber

Can someone tell me what’s going on with me, myself, and my life? The chaos has been piling up — that slow python-like coiling that you don’t notice until, well, you suddenly do. This morning I had to laugh when I took stock of my nightstand situation. How did that happen? And this tells you what a lousy housekeeper I am, too, vacuuming around the piles without thought. At least I’ve been reading, right? And reading does the fiction-writing brain good, right?

River Life

Posted on July 16, 2009 by lalber

And I’m back from the McKenzie River, and I most emphatically did not bring work with me. No laptop. No manuscript that I’m reading for a friend. No notebooks. Just a library book, the latest Laura Lippman.

I did drink red wine. I did eat too much yummy camp food. I did read and nap. I did get on the river. I did socialize with my hosts and their river friends. That’s about it. These images say it all, don’t they?

Three thoughts:

First, old friends are comfortable like p.j.s. I hadn’t seen much of my hostess in 15 years, yet when I arrived it was like old times. No big deal. We’re both a little wider, with a few wrinkles around the eyes, and we lead very different lives, but, as the saying goes: Whatever.

Second, I need more breaks like this, because even though I came back to a work-grind, I feel semi-detached from it, as if my brain regained some of its space — room for creative thoughts to slip in and stick.

Speaking of which, third, an idea did occur to me while in the woods, and it hasn’t fallen into the nothing-hood void that I mentioned in my last post.

Day-job tasks beckon, but first I’m going on a dog-walk, then hitting a coffeehouse, then fooling around on Facebook because I haven’t visited that virtual realm in awhile, and THEN blasting through a little work. That’s my kind of prioritizing!